Loving

As a child, I definitely felt loved. I knew Mom loved me every time she braided my hair, and I knew Dad loved me when he patiently helped me with my homework. My parents showed their love but didn’t talk about it. We didn’t hug in my family. There weren’t a lot of kisses. Saying “I love you” was pretty much nonexistent.

I sound a lot like Mom and Dad these days. I catch myself doing the things I said I wouldn’t do. I lecture Simone and Nadia, scold them, pepper their lives with pithy sayings. Those are just some of the ways I show them I love them. I also fill scrapbooks with memories, put little bows and ribbons in their hair, keep them safe.

Unlike my parents, I am very affectionate with my children. I give out hugs daily. Bear hugs, little hugs. There are kisses in the mornings and especially at night. Sloppy kisses, sweet kisses. I throw in an “I love you” from time to time. An upset I love you, a pleased I love you. If nothing else, I want them to know they are loved every second of their lives, when they squeal with delight or cross their arms and pout. I love them no matter what, and I don’t want them to ever think otherwise.

So, what do you say? How do you show and tell your children you love them?

  • I appreciate your reflecting on how your parents showed you the love. I think about that too–how non affectionate my parents were, but how I know the love was there regardless. I like to say to Sam; “Have I told you that I loved you today?” He likes to say “yes MOM!” or “NO-when are you going to?”. More and more I see showing the love as getting down on the floor and playing, giggling, goofing with the,. (2 and 5) Even though it is often not what I need to do for me. All the more reason to right? Because truth is it always makes me feel better too.

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